I found this journal among some things in Grand Dads attic as far I can tell a does some old relatives of ours but I’m not sure what to make of it may be one of you guys can give me some help here maybe this is some sort of fiction the guy while bored I can’t imagine running the farm was that entertaining but at the same time I don’t know some of the books are legible one I have inscribed what I can down below.

June 12^th was another storming night a real bad one too I think lightning touched down a few times in the past year I’m gonna have to go out tomorrow to make sure nothing is damaged today was good though productive I think rose is going to have that cap soon she getting bigger by the day the hub was talking about going to Sara’s grave again I don’t know if I or the boys will have time she might have to walk there by herself and I wouldn’t say it to her I miss Sara too almost too much I should stay home.

June 13^th someone was out last night in that damn storm Albert found him in the morning he let the cows out to graze and went to check on the chickens before you’re hullabaloo coming from the pasture he ran out there and he found the poor fellow it was obvious he had been out there all night he was so to the bone naked as the day he was born in for a moment I thought I had a dead man on my land but when he started to murmur. I had Albertans bring him inside while I finished up the chores the man saw not awake we dressed him and set him by fire to warm up he’s fevered but Alva was a good girl and she’s taking care of him I’m surprised he’s still alive after being out in the rain all night although I’m not holding my breath to see if he survives the chills might take him before the morning.   

  On June 15^th he finally woke up he’d been out since we’d found him mumbling deliriously and didn't have a typically clue where he was but this morning while Alva sitting by him he opened his eyes and sat up and asked for some water the got no money, and who he is or how he ended up in the pasture a night end up this month’s trip to town earlier than planned. Start asking around someone thought to be missing him and well he sticks out he’s a handsome man with a strong jaw, hair blinds it’s almost and he tall he also had a scar on his back, not a whipping scar and it looks like someone tried to skin him it's only recently healed too in the meantime I helped him get healthy and see if he can handle farm work.

June 24^th we’ve taken to calling our guest Tom he seems amused by the choice and he likes it so Tom it is still no memory but he’s gotten strong enough to walk around and keep the house, Alva, he fancies him practically lives to help him out and show him around I can’t say I disliked the man either he’s quiet doesn’t speak a harsh word since he’s gotten so much better I think I’ll see about having him help me out with the cows in the morning.

On June 26^th the cows don’t like Tom I don’t know why but the minute Tom steps foot in the barn they panic start making a ruckus saying kick out anyone who gets near home I had to make him leave I dint want to panic rose and to loosen her calf the two goats we got don’t mind him though the nail always seems to be an ordinary thing especially Tom can’t under the pen without getting butted so that’s his job now it takes one more thing off me and the boys played.

June 27^th Alva had a nightmare last night their roles lost tree café and gave birth to a dead when alpha got close the calf exploded in a maggot sack crawl down the rows and hate her alive hell of a dream she’s still pretty shaken up about it Tom took over chores for the day he’s good man gonna make the run into town Monday I’m brief Tom with me to see if anybody can place him it’ll be a darn shame when he goes tough the bruises on my backside are finally fading since I don’t have that damn billy goat charging me every time I go in there.

On July 3^rd no one recognized the farm I’m disappointed but I’m also a little relieved it means he can stay around longer we don’t mind having an extra mouth to feed here especially since he is willing to work he sleeps in my room now so no one says bad about Alva I won’t have anybody slanders in my girl’s name Tom doesn’t mind the bed he’s asleep now in his hair is still white as the day appeared it looks like a halo spread around his head now his faces sometimes twists in his sleep as if doesn’t like what he’s seeing maybe he’s seeing pieces of who he used to be but still can’t put together who he is a poor man I can’t imagine not knowing who you are.

July 4^th I had a dream last night Rose gave birth to her calf dead like in all this dream but instead of turning into maggots Tom walked up to it his mouth was turned into a grin so disturbing it made me break into cold sweat he not by the calf and pulled it up by its head before biting its throat worm crawled from the wound Tom chewed on the sport flesh his teeth turned into sharp as knives he got up but he walked to me I couldn’t run away I couldn’t move a muscle Tom kissed me his breath tasted like bitter rot I could feel the wind from the meat squirming into my mouth and down my throat, I still couldn’t move I began to choke on Tom's tongue end the worms when I woke up I found myself chewing on my blanket Tom has woke up and getting dressed time for chores yes if I was alright   I lied and I said  I just had a strange dream my mouth still tastes like worms.

July 6^th no more nightmares none can remember at least but I think I’m walking about in my sleep when I wake up in the morning my feet are covered in mud and I got scratches on my legs like I’ve been walking through thorns it feels like I’ve walked for miles to my thighs ache Tom been a good help though at night he’s been massage my back trying to soothe the pain he talks about his dreams and what remembers I don’t listen to all of it them man has good hands but Tom had brothers once upon a time lots of them it wasn’t a farmhand but he can’t say what he used to do not sure if he can or he won’t. Sven and Tom argued I don’t know what about then seems to get the ideas way down Alva I don’t know where the hell that idea turned out but spends like his mother stubborn wants his mind latches on to an idea if Tom wanted to marry Alva though I’d give that marriage my bless him if that’s what the both wanted he’s taking good care of her.

On July 7^th the calf was born dead alright and Rose died too something must have gone wrong the calf again stuck in that’s what caused the bleeding and I’ll profound their bodies the calf still hanging out of Roses's body halfway as they laid in a pool of blood the stench is so bad I think it’ll stick to the walls forever trying to salvage what we can by butchering the two of them insulting me to save I’m starting to think Tom used to be a butcher he carves meat professionally I might see if he ever wants to leave to get him started in town aside I hate that I lost the cow but it ain’t Tom’s fault no matter what spend things I think Finns been paying a little too much attention in church Devils don’t walk among man the son of the lord made sure of that they have no power over us.

July 15^th I can’t let my children know what happened this afternoon they’d never look at me the same again Tom and I were out repairing the fence when he asked if I could go for a walk further from the house we could be alone the look in his eyes was in the kind of alone that I should have agreed to but I did Tom and I sinned together under the apple tree I loved Sarah.

 On July 21^st Sven and Tom had another fight at first I found it funny Sven was still stuck on the idea that Tom wanted to marry Alva but it turned into shouting and a wave of hot anger. Albert tried to get in between the two to try to calm them down but then Alva fainted her skirt soaked with blood took her into her room and yelled to spend a run for the doctor I do undress her to see if she was injured and when I saw a dead cat was there like it was curled between her thighs and as far I can tell  I had the cat’s body by the time the doctor came it was one of those monthly things I have to talk to Alva tomorrow when she awakens.

July 22^nd I have a confessed to me witchcraft but when she admits she learned it promised chilled me to the bone Tom gave her tools to talk to the devil himself to sell her soul to gain his power I dint believe her I called a liar and that she will burn in hell for tarnishing a good man’s name she burst into tears and she told me everything. Tom told her she had a gift a power that could be unlocked she had first resisted the idea of the devil but he told her how much could be gained as if he was a witch too and she told me it was but she did tell me that he wasn’t a man either I’m going to have to talk to Tom tomorrow I don’t know I’m going to do it but I will.

July 24^th it’s storming again I still haven’t talked to Tom I’ve let him sleep in my bed but I can’t ask him why he turned my daughter to witchcraft I’m afraid of his answer. Alva's strength has returned and more so it’s doubled I have seen more cats black ones I had to set down my journal and thought it was hailing but it’s not it's raining toads and blood.

July 28^th I had to find what Tom was and what he was to have his very presence till caps and turns loving girls into witches he says he’s fallen from grace and the end is gone the reading here is un-legible the pages were stained bloody water and I can’t read it.

August 17^th we buried spend a day I’ve told the time there was an accident that the coward kicked him in the head and that he was killed instantly I wish I could say it was Tom missing and it still rains toad a nine and Alva was gone she left last night Albert’s still here and he’s all I have left god to have mercy on him, please.

August 18^th Tom came back last night he says he wants to stay but he knows I won’t let him. We both know now that his presence brings hatred and death and although he might not have born ill will to the family a man he could not stop his curse. I said if he didn't get off my property I will shoot him in the head and he laughed at that we both know who’d what a fine. I’m so sorry Sven I should have listened to you all my animals are dead I said damn billy go, Sven, is dead my daughters ran into the forest to dance with the witches and marry the devil all I have left in this world is Albert and Tomorrow we’re packing up with little we have left and get out of here. So, Tom won’t be able to find us I don’t know if I can turn to fight again I’m not strong enough.